Monday, June 29, 2009

A Womans Logic is Never Wrong

Sometimes dating a man who does professional fitness for a living is a real pain. He goes around using "technical terms" and "facts" and completely ignores a little thing I like to call logic.

Me: "So I ate 6 cookies before coming to the gym tonight."

ED: "Six cookies! Why?"

Me: "Because I needed a snack and I knew that our work out tonight would cancel them out. That's how it works. I'm surprised you didn't know that. Plus I had milk, which is healthy, so, you know, that helps too."

ED: "Sweetheart, that is not exactly how it works."

Me: "Um, yeah it is."


Yesterday my amazing friends Sarah and Susan responded to my plea for relief from the bondage of homework. We met up at the Utah Arts Festival and even though they chose not to share the dress code with me (bitches) it was exactly the break I needed.

And wouldn't you know, they share the same brilliant logic as me!

We figured the calories from the wine, beer, pizza, hot dogs, ice cream and fries we collectively consumed all didn't count. You see, when you are at an outdoor festival or event nothing counts because they are so few and far between that it's practically a crime NOT to take full advantage. Plus we were out in the hot sun sweating out any pesky calories that may have gotten into our food. Also, should there have been any calories, we were totally covered because we all pretty much skipped breakfast but still managed to do individual morning workouts.

So, yeah, a day of no calorie guilt with my girls! How sweet is that?

Oh and the best part is, as an added bonus for me, Sarah and Susan both agreed that the fact I worked out on a Saturday night counts as double calorie canceling points. So in reality, I'm like way ahead in this whole calorie canceling game and can eat 6 more cookies today!

Psshh! Fitness coach my ass. I should write a book on this stuff.

Blogfully yours,



kel said...

Calories also don't count when you're on your period, your birthday, or if you've had a shitty day.

kel said...

PS....You are all DEAD to me for excluding me yet again.

Susan Mercedes said...

That post makes me want more french fries and Almond Joy ice cream in a waffle cone.

And although Kelli is mad, you can totally ignore her. We've given her EVERY opportunity to move here, yet she keeps turning us down. (She should know that it would be so fun if she lived here too.)

Sarah Bellum said...

I'd totally buy your fitness book if it guaranteed your figure with purchase.

Jenni said...

I totally agree!! Love the tat by the way. Hope to see you some time soon.