Sunday, July 12, 2009

Hey! Where'd You Go?

Fear not!

I'm still here, you just need to link over to my new blog.

Please update your RSS feed and if you link to me just update the link to instead of this Blogspot address. Stop by and let me know what you think!

Blogfully yours,


Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Sometimes Men With Muscles Scare Me

I'm a pretty tough chick most of the time. I kill my own spiders (granted I freak out a little and feel like they are crawling on me for next 10 minutes, but I still do it), I hike up mountains, I take out the trash, I wakeboard, I assemble my own furniture and I hang my own pictures. I consider myself an independent woman who takes care of herself and doesn't take crap from anyone.

Yeah, I'm tough like that.

At the gym last night, right in the middle of their busiest time, I strutted up to the free weights section to work on my arms. I used to rarely venture into the "man zone" as I liked to call it, but since I have been working out with my personal trainer boyfriend ED I have become a lot more confident in my ability and my knowledge of what to do with all those dumbbells.

So I strutted up there, full of all my tough girl confidence, wearing my pink workout clothes and black workout gloves with the fingers cut out and began going through the exercises ED had shown me. I glanced in the mirror and saw two muscle heads working out together and looking at me. No biggie I thought, I'm sure I'm just blocking their view of the mirror. I scooted down a little and started on my next exercise.

The few girls who were also brave enough to be in the "man zone" slowly disappeared and in their place sweaty men with wandering eyes emerged. I continued on. A large serial killer looking man walked between me and the mirror, staring at me while he does so and positions himself next to me still looking right at me.

That's when panic started to set in.

Everywhere I looked I felt eyes on me. Man eyes on me. Apparently all of the women in the gym, including Karina the Russian, were upstairs in the Zoomba class. My heart started to race for reasons other than my work out until finally, in the middle of a set; I had to get out of there.

I left because too many men encroached in my space... at a gym… in the “man zone”.

So much for my tough girl persona.

Am I alone here? Do you ever get intimidated when you go to the gym?

Blogfully yours,


Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Grace in Small Things - Realizations

Grace in Small Things - Realizations

1. Realizing my trip to Chicago for BlogHer is only 16 days away.

2. Realizing my trip to Mexico is only 36 days away.

3. Realizing even though it will be tight, I'll be able to afford both.

4. Realizing I don't have to buy a new wardrobe, the clothes I have will be sufficient enough.

5. Realizing summer semester will be over in less than a month.

Blogfully yours,


Monday, July 6, 2009

My 4th of July Weekend has Inspired me to Join the Circus

A weekend full of surprises, that's what I had!

Surprise #1. Finding out that we would not be traveling to St. George (Utah, not the island) the night before we were supposed to leave due to some issues with accommodations. I was absolutely crushed because I had really been looking forward to getting away, but after killing myself on the treadmill I decided to suck it up and make the best of my weekend vacation time no matter what we did.

Surprise #2. Discovering that my 50 SPF spray sunscreen was not as effective as I would have liked. We went boating on Friday and Sunday at Utah lake and who goes home looking like a lobster? Me, that's who. Of course it helps that my sister is already tan and my parents keep almost all of their clothes on except when entering the water. Regardless, I got burned and it hurts.

Surprise #3. Crashing on the wake board and jacking up my sunburned neck. I fell 4 or 5 times so it's hard to be sure which one caused the damage. I think it was number two...but at this point what does it matter?

Surprise #4. Getting to meet a group of ED's best friends that he has been keeping hidden. Actually I'm not sure if it was me he was keeping hidden or them... The best part of this surprise is that they were all amazing. I loved getting to know them, and in the end they seemed to "approve" of me, and I them. I'm looking forward to spending more time getting to know them in the future.

Surprise #5. Learning how to hula hoop. Also known as making a complete jack ass out of yourself and being caught on video while doing it. FOR THE RECORD: I had no idea my future brother-in-law was recording us!
The blond closest to the camera is my older sister who brought the hula hoops and is very good, the other blond is my younger sister who has a day more practice than me and I'm (obviously) the uncoordinated brunette. I will say though, this is after practicing for about 2 hours. I'm not sure if that makes this video impressive or pathetic...

Surprise #5. Remembering how great it is to just lay on the lawn while the neighbors light illegal fireworks that they bought and paid for. No parks. No crowds. Just family, friends and a dozen or so neighbor kids running around shooting bottle rockets at each other.

Just the way our fore fathers would have wanted us to celebrate.

Blogfully yours,


Friday, July 3, 2009

Instead of a Hard Hat I think I Need Some Valium

I'm not huge on change.

If you are familiar with The Color Code personality tests, I'm a blue. Most people are a mixture of several colors, but not me. I'm a blue-blue. One of the traits of a blue-blue is that they are very resistant to change at first, but once they have embraced it they are the strongest supporters of said change.

My mother introduced the The Color Code to my sisters and me when we were in our teens. Growing up she used to make whoever we dated take the test so she could psychoanalyze them. She would guess what color (or color combo) they were before they took the test and most of the time she was right. I remember being a young teen sitting in our family room reading the quiz questions to a guy I liked.

"What word best describes you? a. Relentless b. Indifferent c. Suspicious or d. Naive"

"Um... what does relentless mean?"

"DAAAAD! What does relentless mean?"

What? My father is a human dictionary, encyclopedia and thesaurus all rolled into one! If I was on Who Wants to be a Millionaire and had to pick one life line, it would be him. Growing up it was a normal thing to hear one of my sister, my mother or of course me, yelling out questions to him while we did our homework.

"Dad! How do you spell conscience?"

"Dad! What's the capitol of South Carolina?"

"James! Do you say afterwards with an s or afterward with no s?"

"Dad! Can I borrow ten bucks?"

Wait, what was I talking about? Oh yeah, the Color Code... or rather my resistance to change.

I'm changing my blog and it scares the shit out of me! I am not an expert and I'm learning this whole technology/programming/hosting/domains/bribe people with booze thing as I go. I am completely dependent on friends helping me in their free time, which means it's taking a little while. WHICH IS FINE (please don't stop helping me)! I'd rather it takes a little while, you know, so I can ease into the transition and embrace the change. I'm telling you all this so that if you are a blue-blue like me, you can anticipate the change and prep your embracing skills. It will be great! GREAT I tell you!

<--Insert nervous yet hopeful laugh here.

Blogfully yours,


Thursday, July 2, 2009

Don't Invite Red Headed Sluts to Russian Birthday Parties

My lovely BFF, Karina the Russian had a birthday! Every year her birthday is a time to celebrate. This year by comparison was a lot more toned down than last years 5 day long celebration, but still an amazing time complete with the most important things: friends, food and cocktails.
The standard pre-party picture.

Staci and Codi
The girls! I love when they put me in the middle.

We were all so happy my babe ED could make it... that is until he invited a Red Headed Slut to join our party...
That bitch makes things all sorts of crazy!

Karina I love you so much! We have been through so much in such a short time. I hope that 27 (the second anniversary of your 25th birthday) brings you all the love, passion, success and "moments" you deserve! Thank you for always being there for me. You'll never know how much it has meant to me.

Blogfully yours,


PS - no actual Red Headed Sluts were hurt in the celebration of Karina the Russians birthday party. They were however consumed by way of shots

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

A Small Fish in an Ocean of Blogs

It's silly I know, but my little blog really means a lot to me. What started out as a hobby and fun way to keep friends and family updated on my life, has become an accomplishment of sorts that I am actually proud of.

I started blogging just over a year ago. My very first post was called "The world is your oyster", a brutally honest raw exposure of myself. I didn't have a name or an identity to my blog then, and truthfully I had no idea what I was doing, I just knew I wanted to write.

A large part of my inspiration for going back to college was this blog. I knew I had ideas and stories I wanted to share, but I also knew from a technical standpoint my writing left a lot to be desired. So last summer, I walked into the Salt Lake Community College, 2 weeks before classes were scheduled to start, and enrolled. Again, I had no idea what I was doing. No game plan. I just knew it was where I needed to be.

Sitting here reflecting, feet propped up on a chair - laptop warm in my lap, it's fun to think of some of the highlights my silly little blog has brought me.

- I remember the first time I got a comment from a blogger I, for lack of a better work, idolized. People like Caveat Emptor, Black Hockey Jesus and the amazing Jenny the Bloggess. It may seem silly, but it totally made my day to think that something, however small and trivial, in my blog sparked their interest enough to visit AND leave a comment.

- I remember coming up with the name for my blog and asking my friend and blogging mentor Sarah what she thought of it. "Honestly I think it's fucking brilliant and wish I would have come up with it." A better compliment has never existed. She helped me register the domain name and set things up.

- I remember getting approved to have ads on my blog through the BlogHer network. It only took 6 months of having them, but I got my first check too. I celebrated by going to coffee with Sarah just this last weekend.

- As it turns out the whole being a student and a blogger really worked out in my favor recently too. I am headed to the BlogHer convention in Chicago in a little over 3 weeks. Truthfully there is no way I could have afforded it without the discounted student rate and I am so happy they offer one. I'll try not to cuss when I pay next months tuition now.

- Last but certainly not least (cliche much?), the highlight of my evening. Getting mentioned on the "Here is the good news happening around our GiST network" email for finally getting the balls to get the tattoo I have been talking about for over 2 years. Seriously, how cool is that?

I know I am rambling on a bit and a lot of these things may not seem like a big deal, but I am a firm believer it's the little things in life that count and you should celebrate ALL victories.

Thanks lovely Internet for giving me more reasons to celebrate! Oh, and the local wine store says thanks too.

Blogfully yours,


Monday, June 29, 2009

A Womans Logic is Never Wrong

Sometimes dating a man who does professional fitness for a living is a real pain. He goes around using "technical terms" and "facts" and completely ignores a little thing I like to call logic.

Me: "So I ate 6 cookies before coming to the gym tonight."

ED: "Six cookies! Why?"

Me: "Because I needed a snack and I knew that our work out tonight would cancel them out. That's how it works. I'm surprised you didn't know that. Plus I had milk, which is healthy, so, you know, that helps too."

ED: "Sweetheart, that is not exactly how it works."

Me: "Um, yeah it is."


Yesterday my amazing friends Sarah and Susan responded to my plea for relief from the bondage of homework. We met up at the Utah Arts Festival and even though they chose not to share the dress code with me (bitches) it was exactly the break I needed.

And wouldn't you know, they share the same brilliant logic as me!

We figured the calories from the wine, beer, pizza, hot dogs, ice cream and fries we collectively consumed all didn't count. You see, when you are at an outdoor festival or event nothing counts because they are so few and far between that it's practically a crime NOT to take full advantage. Plus we were out in the hot sun sweating out any pesky calories that may have gotten into our food. Also, should there have been any calories, we were totally covered because we all pretty much skipped breakfast but still managed to do individual morning workouts.

So, yeah, a day of no calorie guilt with my girls! How sweet is that?

Oh and the best part is, as an added bonus for me, Sarah and Susan both agreed that the fact I worked out on a Saturday night counts as double calorie canceling points. So in reality, I'm like way ahead in this whole calorie canceling game and can eat 6 more cookies today!

Psshh! Fitness coach my ass. I should write a book on this stuff.

Blogfully yours,


Friday, June 26, 2009

Grace In Small Things

I've been pretty bad about posting this week. My excuse? I'm doing some revamping of Blogfully Yours. Still the same site, with all of my crazy stories and random ramblings, but with a new semi-professional "glow" to it. I've been told that I can not rush this process if I want it to be done right, so I'm practicing that little skill known as patience. I'm also doing my research so I don't end up crashing and loosing the past years worth of posts.


So to put things in perspective (whilst I practice my patience), here is an installment of Grace in Small Things:

1. People who are smarter than I and willing to share their know how with me.

2. Having an open discussion with my boss.

3. Taking part in promoting National HIV Testing Day.

4. Sore muscles (it let's me know I did something to them).

5. Setting up my first 401K plan.

Blogfully yours,


Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Deal with stomp-stomp creek-creek or lift heavy objects

I've lived at my current apartment for just under 2 years, which is a record for me. I normally move every 6 months to a year. My lease is up the end of August and I must give 60 days notice if I want to move, which means I have just under a week to figure out if I want to stay put or move out.

For the most part, I have really enjoyed my little place. That is, until the past 2 months when the new upstairs neighbors from hell moved in! Now, I've lived in apartments for the greater part of my adult life so I am accepting of a lot of things, but these neighbors are ridiculous! The are night owls who like to start pacing above my bed at exactly the time I am trying to go to sleep. I know you are going to think I am just being dramatic, but I swear they wear lead boots too. They also play a game every night where they open and shut every drawer and cupboard in their place then go out on the balcony 3 or 4 times slamming the door on their way. I'm sure it's a lot of fun for them but all I hear is stomp-creek, slam, slide, creek, creek, stomp, stomp and occasionally the err err, err err of their bed while they are doing the nasty.

The worst part is, there is absolutely nothing I can do about it... except move.

But I don't want to move! What with all the packing and lifting of heavy furniture. Ugh! I've moved 5 times in the last 4 years and none of the times has been what I consider fun.

So what's a girl to do?

I spoke with the leasing office and they said I could upgrade to a newly remodeled top level apartment for basically the same price as I am paying now (guess the economy has been hard on them too).

But moving... again? Blah!

So now it's crunch time. Deal with annoying neighbors for another year or move. Somehow I don't feel like there is a right answer here.

Blogfully yours,


PS - anyone have a truck?

Monday, June 22, 2009

Every Tattoo Has a Story - Part II

So I did it... After 2 years of talking about it, I actually did it and let me tell you, I forgot how freaking bad getting tattooed hurts! Call me a wuss if you must, but sitting still while someone continuously jams a needle into your back is draining!
I'd like to thank the talented Mitch Anderson of Mutiny Ink for being the one to continuously jam that needle.

Before Picture

Step One: Sketching for placement

Step Two: Drilling The Outline. The most painful part in my opinion.

Step Three: Coloring. I guess the technical term is "shading", but whatev.

Finally, after 2 hours and 15 minutes of resisting the urge to either scream or punch Mitch in the junk, we have the final product (notice Mitch in the background smiling? I swear it is not because I was showing him my boobs! He is probably just happy about the whole not getting punched in the junk part)!
I can't tell you how happy I am with the results! I'm in a shit load of pain right now, but I can't stop staring at it. ED told me he thinks it looks very sexy and to be honest, it makes me feel sexy too.
Right now the challenge is finding clothes to wear. Because of the size and location it makes wearing a bra all but impossible, but going without one is not exactly an option so I'm going to have to suck it up and find a way to make it work.

Pain is beauty, right?

Blogfully yours,


PS - While the parents were a little... um... shocked? at Fathers Day dinner, they did not react too bad. My mothers only question, "did you have to get it so big?".

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Every Tattoo Has a Story - Part I

In the Spring of 2007 I freed myself of a very toxic relationship. I moved in with my parents for a short time to work on getting back on my feet - emotionally and financially. One night, my father and I went for a walk along the Jordan Parkway, a walking/biking trail that runs along the Jordan River. As we were walking along the path it's really quite ugly. The plant life surrounding the trail has not yet woken up from its winter slumber. The river is a murky shade of brown and the dead reeds made the scenery down right depressing. We walked for several miles. Despite the scenery, it felt very cleansing. Then, out of no where one branch of a tree, not more than 4 feet tall shot out of the ground among the ugliness. The branch had green leaves and pink cherry blossom flowers growing all the way up it. I stopped my Father and walked through the mud to it, grabbed out my phone and took a picture. When I got back on the designated walking trail I looked at my Dad and said, "I just found my next tattoo."

When we got home I started researching the meaning behind cherry blossoms and found there are different meanings from China and Japan:

Chinese Cherry Blossom

For the Chinese the cherry blossom is a very significant symbol of power. Typically it represent a feminine beauty and sexuality and often holds an idea of power or feminine dominance. Within the language of herbs and herbal lore of the Chinese the cherry blossom is often the symbol of love.

Japanese Cherry Blossom

For the Japanese the cherry blossom holds very different meaning. The cherry blossom is a very delicate flower that blooms for a very short time. For the Japanese this represents the transience of life. This concept ties in very deeply with the fundamental teachings of Buddhism that state all life is suffering and transitory. The Japanese have long held strong to the Buddhist belief of the transitory nature of life and it is very noble to not get too attached to a particular outcome or not become emotional because it will all pass in time.

The fallen cherry blossom is not taken lightly in Japanese symbolism either. It often represents the beauty of snow and there are many connections made in Japanese literature or poetry to a fallen cherry blossom and snow. This also has been extended to the life of a warrior whose life was ended early in battle.


I am taking bits and pieces from both meaning. For me, it serves as a reminder of the strength it took to get out of a toxic situation, is serves as a symbol of femininity, it serves as a sign of a new beginning and it serves as my belief in finding true love.

I still have the picture I took on my phone that day, although it is save on a disk that I left in my office so I will add it to this post later. But this picture is fairly close to what I will be getting today (4PM MST), but without the Chinese writing.
Wish me luck! Follow up pictures to come!

Blogfully yours,


UPDATE: I found the original picture I took while on a walk with my Dad.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

I Can’t Believe She Actually Hit Me!

Yesterday was much like any other day. I got off work and headed to school. I pulled into a parking spot near the back of the lot, parked and began my ritual of putting on a fresh coat of lipstick and powdering my nose. I was lost in my own thoughts while looking at my reflection when I was rudely jolted into consciousness by another car pulling in and hitting the front of my car! I snapped the visor mirror shut and stared at the driver who was now backing up a few inches so that she was no longer on top of my car. The driver did not meet my jaw dropped, appalled gaze. No courtesy wave. No mouthing of "oops" or "sorry". No getting out to make sure my bumper was still attached. No, this reckless SUV driving student did nothing. I kept on staring at her, in shock of this woman's ignorance and lack of common courtesy manners. Surely at any minute she was going to get out of her car and apologize. I had no idea what I should do. Do I walk over, pound on her door and demand an apology? Do I try to out wait her (at this point she is busy continuing to act like she is oblivious to me and collecting her things) and confront her then?

In the end I did nothing. I’m not a confrontational person and I was on my way to take a math test so, I did nothing. Seriously, what does one do in this situation? No damage was done to either of our cars. Really it was only a parking nudge, but it’s the principle of this person having the audacity to completely ignore the fact that she hit me. It irks me! It also irks me that I don’t know if I should have responded or not.

What would you have done?

Blogfully yours,


Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Next Thing You Know She'll Be Kissing Girls

Last week my sister asked me to pick her daughter Brielle (a.k.a. the worlds littlest princess), from daycare and watch her for a few hours. I told her it was no problem because I really enjoy watching her for a few hours. Emphasis on "a few hours".

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely adore this 3 year old princess and I am partly responsible for her princess complex. I spoil her rotten, put make-up on her, buy her toys, give her candy, cookies, yogurt and fast food, paint her nails, buy her coffee and let her watch PG-13 movies. In return she torments my cat, spills juice/water/wine on my couches, gets chocolate basically everywhere and makes me wipe her princess butt after she screams from the bathroom "SUMMER COME WIPE MY BUM!"

During this particular "few hours" visit I asked her what she wanted to do. Without hesitation she told me she wanted to go feed the ducks. We grabbed what little bread I had and walked over to the pond at my apartment complex.

Now I'm going to wager a bet that her mother is letting her watch more than just princess movies because a diva personality like this only comes from watching too much VH1 reality TV and/or pop music videos.

Watch out world! Miss Brielle Gaga-Perry is coming through!

Blogfully yours,


PS - For those of you who are not familiar with pop-culture references (Grandma I'm talking to you), "I Kissed a Girl" is a song by Katy Perry pictured above left.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Fat Kids Love Cake

ED and I went on our first ever double date. It was us and ED’s best friend and his wife. We went to dinner and after we went to Poplar Street to watch a blues band play called Blues 66. They were absolutely amazing. We ended the night around 10:30 because the other couple has children and babysitters to attend to. 

I know you are thinking, whoopd’y shit. What’s the big deal? Sounds very normal and boring. Well, that is where you are wrong. You see, ED and I only get to see each other twice a week and we tend to be a little selfish with our time. We have to get enough of each other on a Saturday night to last us until the following weekend and that is hard to do when you are with other people. 

When we first started dating, an additional reason for our selfish exclusivity was that we wanted to be sure about the relationship before parading each other around our respective friends. Because honestly, there is nothing worse than bringing a new guy around, letting your friends get to know him only to tell them 2 weeks later that they won’t be seeing him again. Ever. It’s way too much work, plus it’s embarrassing. 

So here we are, 5 months into round 2 of dating and we are doing “coupley” stuff with other couples with no anxiety or second-guessing. It’s really…cool. Finding myself in a happy, healthy relationship with potential for a future is somewhat uncharted territory for me. I haven’t been this comfortable or happy in a long time. 

Sometimes I wonder when the rug is going to get pulled out from under me and when he will turn into a controlling ass hole. I’ll eye him suspiciously expecting the transformation to take place right before my very eyes! But, instead he just smiles at me and says, “Aw honey, I love you. Like a fat kid loves cake.” 

Then I melt. All worry and suspicion floats away and I continue to let myself just be happy because fat kids really do love cake and I really do deserve to be happy.

Blogfully yours,


Thursday, June 11, 2009

No Love Lost

I had to delete a friend from Facebook.

Now, let's be honest for a minute here. There are very few things that one can do to make me feel the need to cut them out of my "virtual friend network" because really it's not like they are "real" friends. Don't get me wrong, a handful of my Facebook friends are real life friends as well as virtual friends, but I'd be lying if I told you I had over 200 real friends; I'm just not that cool nor do I have the energy to be a friend back to that many people. But I digress....

Really there are only 2 ways to get me to delete you. The first is to insult me, my friends or my family. The second is to show intolerance and/or prejudice to another race or lifestyle. In this particular instance both offenses were committed.


Sometimes saying goodbye is not so hard. In fact, it is as simple as the click of a mouse.

Blogfully yours,


Wednesday, June 10, 2009

The First Time Around

As some of you may or may not know, ED and I dated 2 years ago which is how he got his blog name "ED" in the first place. It stands for Environmental Dating, as in dating the same person twice or, for all intents and purposes, "recycling".

Karina the Russian was going through her pictures last night and came across this picture. ED is just so freaking cute I couldn't help but share it with you. This was during my swoopy bangs period and I think my face looks slightly retarded, but I think you can see he made me (retardedly) happy back then, just like he does now.

Blogfully yours,


Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Hola! Me amos es I'm going to Mexico Bitches!

I have some very exciting news! I'm going to MEXICO! Si! Es true. In 2 months I will be laying on the beautiful white beaches of the Riviera Maya with my babe ED.

We have been talking about taking a trip together in between summer and fall semesters. Both of our birthdays are in August (Leo's rule! Rawr!) and it will be the big 3-0 for ED, so we figured what better way to celebrate than by spending 6 days and 5 nights plastered in a foreign country.

We booked our trip Sunday night and of course I had to text Karina the Russian to let her know that it was really happening.

Me: OMG! ED and I just booked our trip! It's official work out, tan and save money like crazy time!

KTR: Yeah! That is so cool! OK, I'm going to start working on your to do list!

So the "to do" list is something Karina gives me before I leave on any and every trip I take. It started when we went to California last year and she made me pretend to be from England and flirt with local surfers. Then it continued when I visited ED's parents for the first time in the country and "have sex in a barn" was on the list. The most recent list came from my trip to Zions National Park where I had to scream from the top of my lungs that I was the queen of the world, much to EDs ultimate embarrassment.

KTR: 1st! Find a hot pink taco and eat it!

KTR: 2nd! Have sex in a sombrero!

KTR: 3rd! Watch a donkey show!

KTR: Drue (random new guy friend) says you need to bring me a grain of rice with my name on it too. Oh, and eat a bacon wrapped hot dog from a street meat cart!

Me: Um... we are not going to Tijuana... we are staying at a classy place!

KTR: Don't worry, I'll have more for you later. I'm watching playboy Hef and he has a new girlfriend named Christal!

Seriously I can't help but love that girl!

If you have items to add to my "to do" list for Mexico, preferably one's that don't involve donkeys or eating questionable food, let me know.


Blogfully yours,


Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Coming Back to Me

Lately I've been distant. It's not just from you, it's been from everyone. I suppose I just let all of life's stresses catch up to me. I was getting pulled in a million different directions and something had to give.

My sanity.

Talking to ED last night he tells me, "Sweetheart, I just feel like all of your emotions are very raw right now." He is trying so hard to be patient and understanding with me when he is probably wondering how in the world his girlfriend went from happy and fun to an emotional wreck. But still, he claims to love me and I choose to believe him.

Today I am happy to report that while I am not better, I have decided to make the conscience decision to be happy, healthy, positive and productive. I'm taking The Secrets approach which is a kind of a "fake it til you make it" approach. I'm going to keep telling myself that I am happy, healthy, positive and productive until it is the truth. Over and over, that is what I am telling myself. So if you walk up to me and I scream "I AM HAPPY, HEALTHY, POSITIVE AND PRODUCTIVE!" Please do not be alarmed, I'm just in the middle of healing myself.

Blogfully yours,


Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Damn Doctor Knows Best

Over the weekend I disobeyed the doctors orders and it felt great! That is, until Monday morning.

Friday I went to the X96 Big Ass Show with Karina the Russian. I was a lot more behaved than I was last year when I was running around getting my picture taken with every rock star I laid eyes on. But, when you have VIP tickets which give you access to free beer.... it would have been a shame to let it go to waste.

A few of the bands I really enjoyed watching were The Airborne Toxic Event (seriously in love with these guys! If you don't know who they are watch THIS), Red Jumpsuit Apparatus and of course Offspring. Offspring was the headlining band and they tore it up! It was so funny to watch Karina looking at everyone else sing along to the songs. "You don't know this one?" I would scream over the crowd. Then she would look at me with her of course I don't know this one I'm from Russia bitch look. I would of course laugh and she would tell me how she was going to take me to Russia and laugh at me when I didn't know the bands who were playing.

The next morning Karina and I went to brunch. I had coffee and the most amazing crab Benedict served over cornbread with an avocado relish. I'm drooling thinking about it again. I kept marveling as we sat outside on the patio at how I really felt OK. All of the symptoms from last week seemed to have magically disappeared. How amazingly wonderful for me!

Saturday night I went to 2 barbecues where the food, margaritas and wine flowed freely. I felt great and had a wonderful time. Then Sunday came along. Damn you Sunday. Such a fun wrecker. I studied for over 12 hours trying to make up for all of my play time then I had a stress induced anxiety attack.

So now here I am, back where I started. Taking several over the counter meds and eating bland foods. Apparently when they talk about school being a sacrifice they are not kidding. My body is telling me I can no longer play like I used to plus handle the stress of work, school and finances. I think it sucks. I think I SHOULD be able to handle it all. But sadly, superwoman left the building a long time ago.

Blogfully yours,


Friday, May 29, 2009

Stress is a Real Buzz Kill

Did you know that holding stress inside for prolonged periods of time can make you physically ill? True story. In fact, it can make you so sick that you have to give up the things you love in order to get better - doctors orders!

I had written a post over the weekend (that I chose not to post) titled "Some Stories Are Not Meant To Be Told". It was basically about holding painful memories back and how it is probably the "right" thing to do.

Apparently... I was wrong.

I am now on a "bland" food diet until I get my "stress/gut symptoms" back under control. That means no spicy food, no acidic food, no greasy food, no chocolate, no alcohol, oh and no coffee or soda! Yeah, so basically what I am telling you is that holding stress inside has ruined my life... at least for the next week or so.

I highly recommend you find ways to communicate your stress, maybe see a counselor or hit a punching bag, that you will not end up like me - sober and eating oatmeal.

Blogfully yours,


Thursday, May 28, 2009

Grace in (very) Small Things

I haven't been posting so far this week because, well, I feel like crap. Sometimes when I don't feel well, I write more because it occupies my mind.

This is not one of those times.

So today I am going to give you another installment of Grace in Small Things.

1. My Mom, or "Doctor Mom" as I have been calling her.

2. A doctors office who can see you in under 24 hours.

3. My new pink iPhone cover (courtesy of Sarah).

4. ED and Karina The Russian becoming friends.

5. Flip Flop weather.

Blogfully yours,


Monday, May 25, 2009

Backhoe Drivers Are Assholes

A few weeks ago I went hiking with my group up Parleys Canyon. We took 3 shuttle cars to the top of Parleys summit, drove down a dirt road and hiked the Alexander Spring Trail - a leisurely 5.3 mile which is mainly downhill.

The hike was beautiful, but then again, there are not many hikes in Utah that are NOT beautiful. We saw a lot of moose tracks and enjoyed each others company.

Here I am in my typical "Happy Hiker" pose.

When you are in the middle of such a beautiful valley, what can you possibly have to NOT smile about...?

We get to the bottom of the trail where 2 other cars had been dropped off. The first car loads up the shuttle car drivers and heads back up to the top. A few minutes later we get a call from one of the drivers saying that someone had driven their backhoe onto the middle of the dirt road so that it is blocking the trail. Going around it is not an option because on one side there is a steep cliff and the other side there is thick vegetation. There is no company name on the tractor or phone number.

Freaking-fabulous, right?

Fortunately we still had one other car with us at the bottom. Unfortunately we had around 12 people show up for this hike so 3 of us had to wait while the car ran a load of passengers to their cars a the mouth of the canyon.

As confused and annoyed as we were for our fellow hikers who were going to have to leave their cars for the night, and even though we were having to huddle together to avoid freezing to death (that may be a slight exaggeration), we still found reasons to smile.

Maybe it was the trail mix... but more likely it was knowing an ice cold beer (or two... or three) was waiting to reward our patience when we got to the bottom.

Blogfully yours,


Thursday, May 21, 2009

Park Lunch With the Russians

I was tired (and by tired I mean too busy trying to catch up on my DVR shows) last night and didn't get a new post written. I decided to bring my laptop with me to work so that I could write on my lunch break. So, since it's lunch time and since I am sitting in a Russian owned coffee shop plus I have these adorable pictures I have not shared... here you go!

My darling BFF, Karina the Russian, often joins me for lunch and brings along her (our) 2 beautiful Russian children. On this particular beautiful spring day last week, we decided that lunch should consist of pizza at the park. The kids couldn't have been happier with this idea.

We soaked up as much sun and grease as we could. Karina commented on how it was so beautiful that you don't even need to close your eyes to "create a moment". Creating a moment is something we often do. You simply take a bite of food, shut your eyes and focus on simply being in that moment closing out all other thoughts. We even do this with the kids so when Dimitri heard his mom say this he promptly spoke up, "nut-uh! Mom you have to close your eyes to create a moment. That's how you do it!"

Not to be out done, little Pasha decided to teach us a lesson as well. Although she is better at letting us figure it out for ourselves rather than telling us. So what did we learn? Do not, under any circumstances, share a drink with a 2 year old child - especially one who is eating pizza!

Blogfully yours,


Wednesday, May 20, 2009

The Perfect Getaway: Zion National Park

I've decided I am either crazy or dedicated to be taking summer semester classes. Either way, I knew I needed to make the most of the 2 week break ED and I shared in between semesters. We discussed lots of options on where to go. My only criteria was that it be someplace mountainey that I could hike and that wherever we stayed had a shower.

How's this for mountainey?

And how's this for a happy hiker?

What's that? You want a picture of a happy hiking couple? How about three?

In case you skipped over the title of this blog, we went to Zion National Park. It was absolutely amazing! We had perfect weather, we didn't kill each other on the drive to and from, and most importantly, I resisted the urge to push him off the mountain after he made me climb our hardest hike much faster than I am used to (that's putting it nicely). Why in the world my boyfriend feels the need to hike a 5 mile strenuous hike, which they say should take 4 hours, in under 3 (thank you very much), is beyond me!

I present to you, Angels Landing:

Honestly, that doesn't begin to do it justice.

We hiked several other hikes, we ate at amazing restaurants (highly recommend the Spotted Dog), and as for the room with a shower, we stayed at the Novel House; a cozy bed and breakfast where all of the rooms were themed around famous authors. We stayed in the Rudyard Kipling room, not because I had any idea who he was (author of Jungle Book), but because I liked the way the room looked best with it's India/Jungle feel to it.

Lastly, Karina sent me with her version of a "to do" list, as she is often prone to do. I can't share the majority of the list... but I will share item number one because it was one of the first things I did, much to ED's embarrassment.

1. Scream at the top of your lungs from the highest mountain "I'M THE QUEEN OF THE WORLD!"

Blogfully yours,


Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Concessions are a gift

Me: "So you know that bruise I thought I got from sitting on the rock at Emerald Pool in Zion? The one on the side of my knee? Well, turns out it really is a bug bite of some sort cause it is all swollen and itches like a son-of-bitch."

ED: "Oh, you mean the one I said was a bug bite all along? Man, I really hate being right ALL the time."

Me: "Yes. That is the one. I debated telling you for that very reason. Consider my 'you were right' as an early birthday present."

ED: "Aw. Thanks baby."

Relationships are all about the give and take. Lucky for ED I'm such a giver in this one.

Blogfully yours,


Wednesday, May 13, 2009

I Would Walk 500 Miles and I Would Walk 500 More

MetropolitanManhattan… both start with an “M”, both sound fancy and both are in downtown Salt Lake City. One is a seedy underground club, one is an upscale restaurant. My beautiful friend Susan invited me to lunch last week…guess which “M” location I ended up at.

“Hey Sarah, I was supposed to meet Susan for lunch today and I think I am at the wrong place. I’m at the Manhattan and it looks a little…um…scary… I don’t think they even serve lunch here either… Anyway, I don’t have Susan’s number, could you text it to me?”

“I’m pretty sure you are supposed to beat Metropolitan… not Manhattan sweetie.”


I get the address from Sarah, look around at the lunch time crowds walking the downtown streets and decide, what the hell? I’m healthy and parking is a pain, I’ll just walk it.

15 minutes later I show up at the correct “M” restaurant looking wind blown and limping from walking in heels that are a half size too small.

Susan and I had a good laugh about my stupidity and she promptly ordered me a glass of wine, then shortly after, another. Thank God Susan has such an amazing sense of humor and thank God she had her car so she could drive me back to mine because there is NO way I was going to walk all the way back.

Attention to detail kiddos… trust me and my blistered feet, it is highly important.

Blogfully yours,

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Last Wednesday's Hike

Sanity = Mountains

Last Wednesday I went hiking with my group. They go every Wednesday evening, but due to school I am not often able to go. We hiked the Bonneville Trail above the University from the Zoo to Red Butte Gardens. Nothing too strenuous, only 4 miles. But it was great to get out in nature and the yellow wildflowers were in bloom which, not-so coincidentally is what I have tattooed on my shoulder (got a few questions due to the picture in this post).

I get to go on one more Wednesday night hike (tomorrow) before school starts up again. So much for a summer vacation! BUT, I am going to go to Zion's National Park this weekend with ED which, so long as I can keep up with him,
I am very excited about!

Blogfully yours,

Monday, May 11, 2009

Mothers Day and Lowered Expectations

Ahh, Mothers day. The day we show the woman who brought us into the world just how much we care. And for me, what better way is there then to place her beautiful smiling face on the internet to be adored by all.

It was a lovely Mothers day. I came over early to help my Dad cook dinner (shh! Don't tell ED, but I actually do know how to cook). My two lovely sisters came a little later. Yes, my lucky mother had all of her daughters present. I've always looked like the mailman's daughter but she and my Dad both swear I'm their spawn.

In the card I gave to my mom, I told her I wanted to have dinner - just the two of us. I said I couldn't promise it would be home made, but I could promise there would be food and quality mother-daughter time together. After reading my card she promptly pointed out that last year I made my Dad a home cooked dinner for Fathers day. To which I replied that that was back when I used to keep food at my place. Right now all I have to offer are pickles, ketchup and a few other various condiments. We laughed about it, but sadly it's true.

How embarrassing! The only good thing about having no food, is that I have lowered everyone's expectations of my domestic skills to the point where they have forgotten I have any. I am now only assigned to bring pre-made pies or a bag of ice to family get-togethers. Much easier than homemade caramel pies or fancy appetizers. Not having food is actually working out IN MY FAVOR!

Blogfully yours,


Wednesday, May 6, 2009

This One Will Need Some Explaining

So, here is a little tid bit of interesting information about me: I sit on the bathroom counter while I do my hair and makeup. It is important that I explain this or the picture below will not make sense. I'm not sure when I started doing this... probably about the time I started to wear makeup. You see I am incredibly blind and sitting close to the mirror is helpful. So there is that, plus standing up to do your hair and makeup is so exhausting!

My beloved no-so-furry feline has been extra lovey and cuddly since the loose of 80% of her body hair. She sits on my lap while I do homework or when I am on the couch. At night she either sleeps on top of me or under the covers around my legs. Oh, my clingy shaven child. And if all that cuddling time wasn't enough, she has decided that if I have an open lap while getting ready, it should be sat on.
I had to take a picture. While this is not the first time she has done this, it is still stinking cute. Guess she is vain just like her mother. Oh, and my bathroom is the type with two side mirrors and one in the middle, in case you were wondering why there are so many reflections.

Blogfully yours,


Tuesday, May 5, 2009

No Sleep Leads to Paranoia

Last night I got no sleep.

I laid down in bed some time around midnight only to hear my lovely neighbor SNORING! This is actually nothing new. I even wrote about it last year. So I went out of my own room to lay down on the couch where it was quiet but not comfortable. I stumbled back into the bedroom around 2... or maybe 3, I'm not really sure, to get a few more restless hours of sleep. I was wide awake a 6 which NEVER happens for me but I got up and ready for the day.

As I was grabbing my keys to head out the door, I got a text.

Mom: "Heard there was a fight and a killing at your apt complex early this AM. Did you hear anything, was it close to you?"

Me: "Awesome. Nope, didn't hear anything."

Mom: "Well I'm glad to know that."

At this point I am walking out to my car looking around for any criminals who may still be lurking. I always thought I lived in a fairly safe neighborhood, but I guess now days you never can tell. I start thinking that maybe I am going to need to move or buy mace or a gun and crap, did I lock my sliding door? When I get another text.

Mom: "You are at the Springs right?"

Me: "No... your other daughter lives there."

Mom: "Oops, got you mixed up! Your still at a reputable place I imagine!"

So now I don't know how to feel. Relieved that murders are not happening next door, or worried about my sister. Sheesh! Texts like that are more effective than coffee. I'm wide awake and jittery already!

Blogfully yours,

Monday, May 4, 2009

I Haven't Killed Them Yet!

A few weeks ago I planted my first herb garden. I don't have a particularly green thumb, but for some reason it has been very important to me that I do not kill these plants. Maybe I worry it will be a reflection on me somehow. Maybe I need to prove that even though my life is crazy I can still help a plant grow. Maybe I feel the need to prove my motherly nurturing skills really do exist. Maybe subconsciously seeing them come to life and grow gives me hope that one day I'll be able to bring a human being to life too!
Ha! Then again, maybe I just really want fresh basil to make bruchetta.

Blogfully yours,

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Finally! A Haircut We Can Both Live With!

The hair, it was a flyin' at my place last night!

I would like to go on the record with saying that I do NOT recommend anyone try this at home. Even with Jenn's professional grade electric shaver and our year of cat shaving experience, I still managed to get a few battle wounds.
But look how cute she looks in her little hooker boots, with her evil glaring eyes.

What can I say? I, like a lot of people out there, like my cat to be shaved.

Blogfully yours,

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Please do not report me for animal abuse

Truly, I had the best of intentions. You see, I have been getting my cat Aurora shaved 1 to 2 times per year for the past, oh I don't know, 4 years. I started out taking her to a vet/groomer where my best friend Jenn worked at the time. They would sedate her and she would wake up looking like a lion. It was awesome! But after Jenn left the vet and the "friends and family" discount was gone, we decided to start shaving Aurora as well as Jenn's cats on our own.
For some reason last night was the night that I felt she HAD to be shaved. Only problem was, Jenn has the fancy-shmancy professional clippers and she was not available. So I decided to pick up a pair and give it a whirl myself, and by myself I actually mean with the help of Karina the Russian.
I know I look evil in this picture... But believe me, we are both MUCH happier when she is shaved. I get to de-hair my place and she gets loved a whole lot more due to the fact that I don't get a handful of hair every time I pet her.
Truth be told I'm lucky my neighbors didn't call to complain once we got started. Cats are not easy to wrestle, even if they love you, they do not want to be restrained (go figure). Ultimately I think the problem was that I only spent $35 on clippers. They gave out about 2 strokes into the hair cut.
But we kept on trying...

Poor kitty looks like a cross between a chemo patient and a road kill victim. I feel like the mom who cuts her kids hair crooked and makes them go to school anyway. Good thing she's a cat and can't feel embarrassment or she might hate me forever.
I sent this picture to Jenn and she felt sorry for my cat and is coming over tomorrow to help me finish shaving her.
Thank god for friends who are willing to help you shave your... cat.

Blogfully yours,

*Please note that I did not make one dirty joke throughout this post. I'll leave that for you.

Friday, April 24, 2009

Getting Out of The Car

There are few things better than the first true sunny spring day at the park. I work a few blocks away from Liberty Park and I often spend my lunch breaks there eating in the car. Rarely have I ever gotten out of the car, but yesterday was different. The sun was out and I couldn't bear the thought of not soaking it in - fear be damned! I spotted the perfect location, a gazebo out in the middle of the pond. No one was sitting there. It had my name written all over it. I exited my comfort zone of confined car door walls, and started the short walk over to my lunch destination. Walking along in my business attire, sharp heels aerating the lawn as I stepped on the moist grass. I felt the soft breeze swirl around me and wished I had the sense to pack a light jacket. I had been so excited to hear that the temperature would be in the 70's that nothing else mattered, outside of wearing the new sleeveless spring top I had purchased 3 weeks prior.

I continued on, walking across the wooden and steel bridge, then carefully stepping around, so as not to wake, the nesting geese. I choose a bench in the sun. Ah the sweet warm sun. Soaking it up for a minute before opening up my sandwich. A flood of memories of all the times I had come to the park and never stepped foot outside my car, except to deposit my trash, came rushing to me. I used spend 3 to 4 lunch breaks a week sitting in my car talking to the foreign man of my affection. "So, what are you having to eat today? Sandwich? So predictable."

On the park bench, hearing the birds call to each other and watching the clouds lazily float by, felt different. I felt alive, like I was finally living in the moment not dreaming of moments that would never be. I closed my eyes while taking in several deep breaths. When I opened them and once again became aware of my surroundings I took out my predictable sandwich and savored every last bite taking comfort in the fact that today, I was not predictable. Today I got out of the car.

Blogfully yours,

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

My First Herb Garden!

In celebration of 2 days ago (4/20) I planted my first herb garden! OK, that is a total lie... I mean I did plant the herbs, but they are all of the legal strain and it was simply a coincidence that I did it on or around the same date.

I had stopped by a friends yard sale and there was this cute little herb kit for sale with pots, seeds and a book that tells you all about growing a herb garden. I asked her how much and she told me because she loves me, it was free! Score! Only one problem, it didn't come with dirt or potting soil... whatever you want to call it. Luckily, I knew a place to score some dirt.

"Hey Mom? Can I score some of your dirt? You know, the good stuff?"

"You are so odd sometimes. It's in the garage, you'll have to have your father cut the bag open."

Apparently my parents score the good stuff in bulk. I'm talking Costco size bags (yes that was plural) of potting soil. But hey, I'm not complaining because I got my free dirt to plant my free herbs. It's all about free love baby... or something like that. I was never much of a hippie, so I'm not sure...

Anyway I have been told that it is very hard to grow herbs from seeds and I haven't read the book that came with it, so any herb growing advise you have let me know!

Blogfully yours,