Sunday, September 21, 2008

College is the best diet ever

Yesterday I tried to pay bills and had a nervous breakdown. I knew things would be tight after my trip to California, but I wasn't expecting not to be able to afford ANYTHING, including my tuition (Damn the California shopping again! And Damn you low self control!!!). So I did what any normal person would do - I panicked. I'm not exaggerating here. I had a full blown melt down for about 10 minutes, then it lessoned to just a nervous breakdown. I had plans to go out with some friends and I called them off because, well...I was having a nervous breakdown. I had also planned to go to the grocery store but decided that store bought food was a luxury item I could do with out. Instead I headed to my parents house because I left my book (Twilight) there. Side note: I am totally obsessed with this book. I am in love with Edwin. I want to take him home and make some vampire babies with him. Holla if you know what I am talking about. So I am getting my book and I am starting to tell my parents how I am starving and can't afford to eat and bless their wonderful charitable Mormon hearts, they let me do my grocery shopping in their kitchen, frezer and cold storage. I left with 2 bags filled with fresh vegis from Dads garden, cans of soup and corn, Diet Coke, frozen mystery soup, frozen sausages and a few other random items. Honestly I was so happy coming home and unpacking my bootie that I decided it was Saturday nightand homework can wait. I stuck a Lean Cousine in the microwave (it required the least amount of cooking effort), popped open a Heineken and read my book for 2 hours. I was the perfect Saturday night in!

While I haven't figured out what to do about financial predicament, I am feeling much better and I know everything is going to work itself out. It just a matter of time and being creative. I finally understand what it means to be a starving college student. My hip bones are poking out like they did when I was in high school, and trust me it is not attractive! But all of this starving and stress is just going to build character, help me get a higher paying job and round me into a better person in the end. Right? RIGHT? Please agree with me because I swear if this whole living on canned soup thing for the next 2 years or more doesn't pay off in the end in some way I will go postal and I am not even kidding! Momma likes to eat! Even though I don't have time for a social life, I am still finding time to go on a few dates, because they feed me and I need to have nourishment in order to draggy my frail body to class!


Sarah Bellum said...

Doesn't it make you question the whole freshman 15 theory? Who has the extra money to eat? Exactly.

You'll be OK honey. If I can manage you can. I'll split a box of M&C with you anytime.

kel said...

Damn. This makes me want to go back to school. Just so I can lose some weight.....and I'm glad you finally found a use for men.

Latent Image said...

I always wondered why i looked slightly healthier than a concentration camp victim, now I know.

Im a starving male, and women don't buy me food on dat...Oh wait I don't really date either. nevermind

Helmey said...

how many rolls of TP did you steal from your folks? was it the soft or cheap kind?

Why don’t you roofie your friends and or dates and rob them...

again you're welcome for the advise and I’m not going to hang out with you again till you get back on your feet...I’m sick of being roofied.